Saturday, April 26, 2008

That Sense of Impending Badness...

A certain sense of impending wrongness has settled over me this evening. It's hard to pinpoint it's actual origin. It's not that the dogs are still here, and still making a mess of my lawn and gardens - that alone isn't enough to make my insides feel so heavy.

A woman who was an acquaintance of mine died today. She was young, and left two little boys. It's a sad situation, but the feeling is wrong for that, too.

I have company coming in tomorrow and Monday. The place isn't as clean nor as tidy as I'd like, and I need to get to the grocery to fill in the holes in the planned menus, but that's just a few hours of work that I'm avoiding.

I wish I wasn't the mom for a while. It would be a relief if someone else took care of the big things, had to be the one who took the long view, planned for the future, watched the budget, and fixed everything that went wrong in the midst of life.

sucks to need a vacation, and know fer durned sure I'm not headed anyplace for a long while.


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